Random Observations

Spring dawns in the country in upstate NY. The frogs are swimming in the pond and hanging out in the grassy shores. Bugs skim the top of the water, playing in the sun without a care. With the dawn of June 2017 thousands of happy tadpoles swim near the edge of the water. Some venture out into the deeper waters but all is serene and happy. Mid June the bullfrogs invade the pond and the little frogs start to disappear. Some hide, some got eaten. July replaces June and there are 10 goldfish and 10 minnows introduced into the pond. Day after day I watch the fish grow big from eating the mosquito larvae in the pond. The birds and the bullfrogs have eaten all ten minnows and one gold fish. The remaining eight gold fish swim in a school. The site of fish eggs on a stick in the water, makes me wonder if the schooling is to protect each other or as part of their mating ritual. As I walk the perimeter of the pond I notice a large dark shadow moving in the water.

Looking back I'm amazed this marriage has lasted as long as it has. I guess if he'd married someone as selfish as he is, he would have been divorced a lot sooner than 12 years.  All I know is that after shouldering 100% of the responsibility for this marriage over the past 12 years I am finally at my wits end and ready to throw in the towel. I don't like that I will have to break my promise of "Til death do we part" but that man raped me last Sun day and had nothing to say for his actions. He acted like I was wrong for being angry at him for forcing himself on me after I told him no sex four times in 30 mins. I have never been so livid in my life. At first I was suicidal because it seems like this is all I ever get and it never changes. Then I thought, "Why the hell should I give up my life for that asshole?" He's done enough damage so now it's my turn to turn the tables on him and make that fucker pay large for what he's done to me these pa

For you morons out there that think you're fooling the world with your childish mind games. Two things: 1.) You're half right. You are a fool. 2.) Anyone with a brain can see right through your pathetic behavior. As for the current Silly bitch that has been darkening my doorstep: I've been listening to your lies and watching you play your silly little mind games on me without reacting despite how annoying it was for me. Against my better judgment, I gave you the benefit of the doubt. All that did was encourage more betrayal and lies from you. I gave you 7 of my customers to help you  get started. You chased every last one of them away with your slacking off and lord only knows what else you got busted for. What did you think was going to happen? Were you hoping to hide behind my name so you could make me look bad and destroy everything I had worked so hard for?  What is so pathetic about your life that you think it's okay to betray the one person who gave y